Friday, July 02, 2004

Gaining ground

The little frustration and anger I felt yesterday regarding E. seems so insignificant in light of the unbelievable feelings I have today after spending two hours with J. Yes, there was some sex involved, but it was only a small part of all we shared. And I'm finally beginning to realize that I can matter to someone, not just because I give them a blow job, but because they feel good being with me, all of me. With J. today the conversation was so open and honest in a million different directions. The kisses were heartfelt, the sex passionate and erotic. I realize there is some "unhealthiness" in having this kind of extramarital relationship, but this kind of relationship makes me realize how worthless a relationship with a true user like E. is.

1 comment:

Summer said...

I was wondering about you and your extramarital relationships. Are they part of the addiction that you're fighting? Did you have relationships prior to the internet addiction? Do you seek out other men because you're unhappily married? Is your husband aware of what is going on? I hope my questions don't sound overly nosy.