Friday, January 14, 2005

A powerful revelation

It just occurred to me after considering W.'s situation when his wife went out of town, a situation I have been in myself, where I am so excited to have the "opportunity" to act out, that this was the same feeling my father had when my mother would leave and my sister would be gone and he would have me in the house to himself.

Wow, what a powerful revelation. So powerful in fact, I don't know what to say or think. One thought that crosses through my mind, as my stomach comes up into my throat is, "I am just as sick as he was." I know it's not true -- I haven't taken advantage of innocent children. But still, the similarities are too close for comfort.

I ask for blessings for us all, especially those of us who lived through incest.

1 comment:

Gus Paul said...

That's a pretty harrowing post, Rae. I think the "acting out" thing is a common sentiment. My girlfriend is currenly away, and I'm finding it difficult to stop myself picking up the phone to someone I shouldn't. I've managed it so far, but I also haven't drunk any alcohol. That'll be the real test...